This week marked the return of bread week on The Great British Bake Off. Howard Middleton fills us in on how the bakers fared.
‘Decent.’ Hardly the most effusive of compliments but, in what has long been regarded as Paul’s week, the bakers are grateful for any of his crumbs of approval. Andy calls him ‘The Breadfather' with equal amounts of respect and trepidation, as he embarks on the signature bake of twelve savoury buns. Having raided his
daughter’s lunch box for mini salami sticks, he chops and adds them to Cheddar and chives. ‘I could just sit here and eat this all afternoon,’ says Prue. Paul duly rewards the cheerful baker’s work with his new favourite word.
And ‘decent’ is back again for Christiaan’s plaited knots of porcini mushroom, sage, hazelnut and truffle. Having shown concern about the combination of flavours, Prue admits, ‘I was wrong. They go together beautifully.’
Celebrating the ‘ethnic harmony’ of her marriage, Nelly takes a milk dough from her Slovakian roots and sandwiches it with a vegetable curry from her husband’s Pakistani heritage. ‘I was expecting more of a punch from it,’ says Paul. Nelly resists giving him one herself and advises him to dip the bread in the accompanying coriander and chilli chutney. ‘Oh, yeah... it works,’ he concedes.
Famed for her love of ‘northern portions,’ Gill packs her generous buns with black pudding, chorizo and goat’s cheese, then finishes them with a drizzle of her soon to be patented ‘mustard custard.’ ‘Original, delicious and witty too,’ says Prue.
‘Are you putting lavender in it?’ asks Alison of Mike, as she eyes up the ingredients of his spiced lamb ‘Baa-o Buns.’ ‘It’s rosemary,’ he explains, and Alison suggests re-filming the conversation to hide her ignorance. ‘It’s delicious, but I’m getting more cumin than lamb,’ says Prue. At least she’s not getting lavender.
Sticking with a floral theme, Sumayah stuffs her milk bread rolls with curried chicken and shapes them like sunflowers. ‘Absolutely delicious but a little dry,’ says Prue. Paul adds they’re ‘underproved.’
'Yeah, nice – I like them,’ is Paul’s constructive critique of Illiyin's coconut buns, filled with Jamaican brown stew chicken and topped with crispy chicken skin.
John tries to elevate his oregano pesto, feta and caramelised onion buns with a touch of gold leaf. Beautifully risen they may be, but beneath the gilded surface they’re hiding an air pocket with very little filling. ‘Oh dear,’ says Paul disapprovingly, and though Prue likes the flavour she says, ‘the texture’s not right.’
Dylan goes for a simple scored finish to his originally flavoured gochujang and confit garlic rolls, which not only secure the young baker a handshake, but also some future career advice. ‘You could probably sell a lot of them,’ says Paul.
Cruelly concluding that Georgie’s wild garlic, dill, mozzarella and sundried tomato Chelsea buns are just a grating of Parmesan short of a handshake, Paul consoles her with the first ever pat. From the bench behind, Mike beams and says, ‘you’ve just made history!’
In a week of Hollywood premieres, Paul is centre stage again for a new twist on the technical challenge, as he demonstrates the art of a seven-strand plaited wreath. ‘Now you just need to recreate it, without the startling blue eyes and the sausage-y fingers,’ advises Noel.
It’s easier said than done, as the bakers soon forget the exemplary length and placing of the strands. Dylan overlaps and ends up with an unwanted hump. John’s are unmanageably short. Andy suddenly realises he’s mistakenly put the egg wash in the dough and is compelled to start again.
Away from the chaos, Prue is so enthralled with Paul’s bread that she says she wants to kiss it. At the final ranking, Mike gets another ‘decent,’ Andy is shocked to come third, and John and Dylan bring up the rear. Tearful Nelly is overwhelmed to learn her loaf is almost as kissable as Paul’s.
There’s a cornucopia of... well, cornucopia on display for this week’s showstopper, as the bakers have four and a half hours to make a massive horn of plenty, filled with at least two other types of bread.
‘Where’ve you been all my life?’ asks Paul, as Gill describes her perfect Devon holiday fare of ‘bacon, beer and cream teas.’ Translated into bacon and onion plaits, beer bread and Devonshire splits, it’s a winner with Prue too. ‘Quite mild flavoured, but it’s delicious,’ she says.
Andy channels a holiday across the pond for his New York inspired horn of cinnamon pretzels, pizza buns and focaccia muffins. Unfortunately, the baked goods don’t quite match the descriptions. ‘They’re all acceptable,’ says Prue, ‘but they’re not what they’re called.’
Closer to home, Sumayah takes inspiration from family recipes for a pretty flower-strewn horn. Her cinnamon and star anise concha rolls are judged to be ‘a bit boring’ and Paul and Prue are uncharacteristically silent about her feta, dill and parsley fataya bread, but the horn itself ‘tastes great.’
Christiaan is also doing a little flower arranging with strawberry and cardamom jam roses and garlic and Stilton orchids. Prue likes the roses but says they’re ‘mainly filling’ and neither judge can taste the Stilton. Paul questions the shape of the ‘orchids’ with a look that suggests they’re dangerously close to being ‘indecent.’
‘Luxurious’ is a more welcome description for Georgie’s ‘massive’ horn filled with pecan and pumpkin buns, tahini swirls and chocolate and hazelnut babka. ‘Delicious’ is Paul’s reaction to Illiyin's feta and harissa wreaths and halloumi and olive knots. He questions the texture of Mike’s rosemary fougasse but is more favourable towards his savoury twists. Prue simply says, ‘I love it.’
There’s love in abundance too for Dylan’s cat-themed cornucopia, which, as Noel points out, looks like the work of Tim Burton. With maple, bacon and cinnamon knots, amaretto crème brûlée doughnuts and a perfect white loaf, served with whipped bone marrow, it’s both a visual and culinary feast.
Nelly’s potato and onion bread horn, filled with walnut wreaths, orange and poppyseed samosas and sweet cream cheese buns gets an ‘amazing’ for its detail and ‘spectacular’ overall.
However, though John may be showing pride with his rainbow-hued bread, he finds it hard to feel any love for his sunken cinnamon bagels. Alison consoles her fellow West Midlander with some advice from her time on Strictly, saying ‘someone could still fall over.’ Unfortunately for John (and unlike last week), nobody does and week one’s Star Baker becomes week three’s evictee.
As for this week’s Star Baker, it looks like Nelly’s consistent performance is about to make her a shoo-in... And then Dylan nabs the title instead, pulling off that rare feat of still triumphing despite coming last in the technical challenge. He’s clearly thrilled by the accolade, but even more so by someone’s assessment. ‘Paul said I’m a decent little bread baker... that is wicked!’
Check back every Wednesday for Howard's weekly Bake Off recaps.