Great British Menu 2023: Central England recap
Howard Middleton lets us know what happened in the final week of heats in this year's Great British Menu, which saw four chefs from Central England battling for a place in the final.
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Great British Menu 2023‘Much like Highlander, there can be only one.’ An observation perhaps more suited to the Scotland heat, but this was from the charismatic Kareem Roberts, head chef at Trinity in Cambridge. Acknowledging that successive elimination is the nature of the game, he accepted his early exit. Private chef Marianne Lumb braved the competition again after a four-year break (and served up an even braver vegan main course) but just lost out on a tie break to newcomer Thom Bateman, chef patron of The Flintlock in Cheddleton.
And here it gets complicated. Under normal circumstances there can be only one Tom – head judge, Mr Kerridge, but Thom (with an aitch) is also joined by Tom Shepherd, chef patron of Upstairs in Lichfield. Andi Oliver took to calling them Brummie Tom and North Staffs Thom. I’ll settle for Tom K, Tom S and Thom. Obviously, Tom K will be doing more eating (along with his friends Nisha Katona and Ed Gamble). Tom S and Thom seem to have bonded too but will inevitably be cooking off until there’s just one Tom… or Thom.
Oh, let’s just get on with the canapés. Tom S’s is a tuna sashimi croustade, dressed in ponzu with a soy mayonnaise and chive garnish. Thom’s is a roe deer tartare tartlet, dressed in fermented chilli oil. It’s a thumbs up for both, but all agree the tuna is ‘getting lost’ in Tom’s, so Thom tops it. As the voice of Vanessa the Dragon in animated children’s TV series Circle Square, guest judge Duaa Karim should feel at home with Thom’s starter, ‘Dragonology’. His carved celeriac dragon’s egg is flavoured with soy, white miso, mirin and rice vinegar, filled with caramelised celeriac puree and covered with crispy potato scales. It nests on a plate of sherry vinegar caramel, Sichuan pepper-pickled pink onions and a ketchup of dates, black garlic and roasted apple. Thinking that date ketchup is a first for her, Duaa is duly
enlightened by Tom K, who says it’s a posh way of saying brown sauce. He goes on to bemoan a shortage of potato scales and Nisha’s celeriac proves to be a little hard, so it’s generally judged ‘not quite banquet-ready’.
Still on the theme of computer games, Tom S reimagines the iconic Pac-Man as a yellow beetroot and pear jelly, feeding on salt-baked golden beetroot, compressed pear, smoked almond mayonnaise and chopped smoked almonds. Slightly underwhelmed by the flavours, the judges agree it’s still an enlightened bit of cooking. ‘If this started the banquet… it would put a smile on everyone’s face,’ says Ed.
The famously unsmiling Fungus the Bogeyman is the inspiration for Tom S’s breakfast-style fish dish. Cereal dishes of kohlrabi balls and a smattering of shaddock are topped up with roasted cod loin and caviar, with a milk carton of green champagne fish velouté and a box of flaked corn granola on the side. ‘Fish is perfect. The sauce is divine,’ exclaims Nisha, but the judges are divided on the merits of cooked kohlrabi and savoury granola.
A nice bit of fish for Korky the Cat (and the judges) is Thom’s next offering. Hiding under the comic cat’s hat is pan-roasted and brown-butter-basted hake fillet with burnt leek, cauliflower puree, pickled cauliflower stalks and sea lettuce. Tempura-battered chunks of hake belly accompany, along with a dill and caper emulsion. Enthralled by magical cooking, the judges reluctantly question if there’s a strong enough link to the brief. ‘The food has got the wow factor in terms of flavour. How’s the presentation?’ asks Nisha. ‘I think it could have been better,’ replies Duaa.
Ed should be happy, as he’s been craving a slice of ‘Desperate Dan’s Cow Pie’ since this year’s brief was announced. Tom S obliges with his big beef cheek, potato and onion pie with a hot water and beef fat crust, served with roast sirloin steak, maple glazed carrots, mushroom ketchup, chive emulsion and glossy gravy. This week’s veteran, Paul Ainsworth called it ‘the best pie I’ve ever had’. ‘Fantastic!’ smiles Ed, and Tom K says it’s ‘absolutely everything I love about food’. For some unknown reason, the thinly sliced potatoes just haven’t cooked through enough, but Tom K still judges it to be ‘wholesome, rich, filling and fun’.
‘May un Mar Lady’ is Thom’s meaty tribute to a North Staffordshire cartoon strip, the Potteries dialect and food that goes with brown sauce. Yes, Thom’s brown sauce is back, and it seems that almost anything goes with it – barbecued beef sirloin, miso onions, carrots in beef fat with bone marrow breadcrumbs, pommes dauphine, Staffordshire ale sauce and a regional ox cheek stew called a lobby. ‘What a great dish,’ declares Tom K, and Duaa says the potatoes are ‘amazing’.
Inspired by Paddington’s neighbour Mr Curry, Tom S creates an unusual pre-dessert of coconut rice pudding, mango sorbet and sweet Thai curry foam. Thom’s pre-dessert is a yogurt and meadowsweet sorbet with compressed apple, honeycomb and gingerbread mousse. Duaa and Tom K like the individual components of Thom’s but don’t think they quite complement each other. However, it’s compliments all round for Tom S’s. ‘This is fantastic,’ says Nisha, and Tom K agrees it’s ‘brilliant’.
Having stunned us all with his impersonation of Bananaman earlier in the week, Tom S now hands over his costume to one of the poor servers, who looks less than comfortable in a cape. The dessert, however, is a perfect fit for a banquet dish. The white chocolate mock banana is filled with banana mousse and chocolate popping candy and a side of airy banana cake is topped with caramel and banana ice cream. ‘Outstanding,’ proclaims Tom K.
Finally, it’s Thom’s sweet microphone dedicated to Famous Fred the singing cat, made up of milk and woodruff parfait, Pedro Ximénez reduction, grated frozen chocolate, compressed and pickled pear and a cocoa tuile. ‘That looks nice,’ says Nisha, which sets the tone for a subdued response from the other judges. ‘A bit one dimensional,’ admits Tom K, and although Ed politely suggests that ‘the dimension is nice’, it’s clear Famous Fred is playing second fiddle to Bananaman.
So, with tens across the board for his dessert, Tom S not only flies through to next week’s finals but also puts himself in pole position for the banquet menu. Ah, but then there was Adam Handling’s ‘Food Fight’ and Nick Beardshaw’s ‘Balloon Girl’ and… That Highlander quote isn’t always right – there’s a lot to be said for dessert trolleys.
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